i went on a weekend getaway this passed weekend with my girl liezl...and i must say that if all weekends were like that, not only would i be broke, but it would be AWESOME! lol...

friday afternoon we headed to windsor and on our way there, made a stop at the outlets. i called up my buddy and told him we made a detour, and i was like "you did NOT tell me we were passing outlets!" haha...but then it's quite new so there weren't many stores yet. but it was still good times. after about an hour, headed the rest of the way to my buddy's...we chilled for a bit, talked and played cards. that was fun b/c honestly i haven't even played cards in YEARS...no joke! ...then we grabbed dinner and got ready for some good times!

we headed to jack rabbit slim's and boy was it a good night. for those of you who know me, it runs in my family to be an alcoholic! haha...we have high tolerances, but i have managed to get drunk. but on friday night i experienced something for the first time. i was cool, lil tipsy but feeling good...just when we were about to leave i couldn't walk and the room started spinning! hahhaa..i was like WHOA! =S ...i had to chill for a bit while my buddy waited for me and all! haha...i lost my voice that night and kept saying "you know it's a good night when i lose my voice" haha...it was a really GREAT night and mos def needed b/c of the mad pile of school work i've had

saturday was the long awaited masquerade BALLin that we've been excited about since jan...and it was fun times too! =D haven't gotten dressed up in a while and it was great to see everyone looking hot...we had to sneak in drinks and it made us feel like we were 16 again! lol...

we headed back yesterday and got back in london at 7:30 =( ...it was a really good weekend...filled with drinks, jokes, hugs, kisses, mixed emotions, good freakin times...nothing was missing...it was perfect...

now it's back to reality ...more work =(
got 2 mini essays and a quiz on wed...had a lab due today and a quiz and both didn't go well
=( ...i think we need to head back to windsor! haha

now i'm just drained

b/c i'm too tired to do all the html to post pics...
eye candy is posted on facebook =)

here i am sitting home alone on a saturday night
BOREEEDDD out of my mind!

i was going to go out tonight, then i decided i didn't want to once i heard it was a raunchy place...but then i felt like going out so i called up my cousin. when i found out he wasn't going, i didn't want to go b/c i did'nt know how i would get there and back. he told me to just reach over and i'll be able to find a ride, but i guess i just didn't want to hassel or bother anyone else for a ride espeically if i'm not as close to all of them. so then i decided to head out with my brother. he was cool with that - i mean he shold be since he always chills with me and my friends right? haha...so i got ready - we were gonna go to a salsa club [yea i know right...me? in a salsa club!!? haha...i can't dance salsa for crap although i wish i could!] ...i got ready, was dressed and had my make up on, just about to add the accessories when my brother knocks on my door and apologizes, but there was no space for me in the car =(

so i got ready...for nothing

i called up my friend ro b/c she wanted to chill earlier but got her voicemail and i was wasn't in the mood to leave a msg

then i head on the computer and go on facebook to find a msg from my friend that made me upset. since jan...like 3rd week me and 3 of my girls have been planning to head to windsor march 24th for a formal. we were all excited b/c we haven't gotten dressed up and went to a formal in a while, and it would be the last one we would have together before graduating and what not. we would talk about it everyday and have it planned and everything!

then on thurs, i had a girls night with sophie and liezl and find out sophie can't make it so that made me and liezl really sad. but we took it in and understood. then i come home and find out that my car is messed and still not fixed. i was supposed to have it fixed and driving it back to london tomorrow, but it wasn't. i find out that there's something leaking and it's going to cost me almost $700 to fix!! =S that too got me upset b/c i was supposed to drive to windsor! and then when i went onto facebook i find out my friend kaye is working and isn't sure if she can get it off! =(

soOoOoOo it hasn't realy been a good day...actually it hasn't been a good week!
i've been stressed out of my mind about living situations for next year, bombed yet another exam, and received bad news numerous times!

THIS SUCKS!
i was really looking forward to windsor
i was really looking forward to having my car back in london so i can get up and leave and go to the mall whenever w/o having to wait for the damn bus
i was really excited to get out tonight and drink it all away - at least not let everything bother me for a couple of hours

but
i guess
things just don't like to go my way
most of the times!

=(

so i'm on reading week now
my midterms were freaking BRUTAL!!! buuut oh well =S

things are going well other than that i guess
i went boarding for the FIRST time today at blue mountain....apparently my brother and cousins don't believe in the bunny hill! lol....i must say that boarding is mad fun!! i just can't wait till i get better!!! b/c honestly my knees are hurtting! lol i swear my full knee cap is bruised..uhh both of them! lol...there was this one time when i full fell RIGHT on my knees! that was a lil painful!

the time when i actually got to feel it was when my cousin went down with me and helped me ....he held my hands and it was wicked! hahaha..i didn't fall and i was getting the hang of it! =D

so obviously the roommate and i didn't find any last minute deals or else i would've been lying on the beach right now! we were planning on going on a road trip, but don't think that's gonna happen. i think i'm actually gonna use reading week to my advantage...i'm just gonna chillax and hopefully i'll see some people! and my goal is to get my two essays out of the way so that when i get back to school i can just party it up ...again! =D

they all told me that i'm gonna be soOoOoOO sore tomorrow and i won't be able to get out of bed....part of me isn't looking forward to that b/c being sore sucks! but the other part is like helll yaaaa! haha - b/c i totally missed my bed!

feels good to be home! =)

so it's been a while since i've written anything on here.
things have been going well. i've been going out a lot more and having a lot more fun...i don't know what happened to anti-social janet! haha...but it's been some really good times! =D

last week we went to taphouse on thurs and then i went home on friday. headed over to century room on sat and mind you this was my first time going to a club in TO since my 21st birthday! haha...crazy! i've been clubbin more in NYC than TO! haha...but it was fun...different atmosphere and crowd. i liked it espeically the fact that they had a LIVE sax player....even though he wasn't that great i still thought that was hot! lol

we went to phoenix on friday and o man that was a really good night!
i was supposed to get all my studying done on the weekend, which didn't go very well =S....i ended up just studying yesterday for my midterm that i had this morning at 9:30am...so i finished not too long ago and i think it went well *crosses fingers*...i'm really tired but we'll see how it goes

main news...i just applied for G R A D U A T I O N!!!
it's going by so fast! me and liezl went to get our grad rings last thurs and now i applied to graduate! it's unreal. let's just hope that i graudate and won't have to come back here! haha...that would suck! but if that's what i have to do then i'll do it =S

i'm heasding to niagara this weekend for my grandma's birthday!! i'm excited to see my fam =D and to goooo shoppppinggg!!!!!
i go in and out of my shopaholic states, but this has officially been the longest one ever! haha...i've been spending soo much money lately. not just on shopping but on going out, eating out and just stuff =S....i've been trying to save but that's CLEARLY not going well! hahaha

oh well
you only live once right? =D

hope everything is going well
time to head back to class *thumbs down*

i would like to think that i am an individual and i am the one in control of my life. but sometimes i face a moment of weakness and it turns things around and i feel like someone else is controlling my life.

somethings that you do may have a greater effect on me than you know, but i'm done. i'm not gonna put my life on hold and i'm not gonna sit around and wait.

i gotta learn that although i am the one in charge of my life. no doubt about it, i cannot control every little thing in my life. sometimes you just need to "let go....let flow!!" ....aww i love that quote! it's from the movie "something new" and at this moment it is the quote that i'm going by.

i had a moment of weakness last night
but i woke up this morning feel great
my head is up and i'm not gonna let it bother me anymore!

and done.

sorry...i just had to vent
lol

so it's almost been 2 weeks into the second term and i'm actually really proud of myself! i'm staying on top of all my readings and yet i'm still having time to chill =) ....i only have chem to really catch up on but it's just so hard to get back into it after the break. it's my only full year course so i have to bring my game up on this term.

girls night has been my saviour. i don't know what i would do w/o my girls liezl and sophie =D....last term we promised we would have girls nights and try to make them weekly and stuff. it didn't happen! haha...we got together a couple of times then most of the times after it was just me and liezl b/c sophie had prior engagements...haha...but this term so far it's been good =)...we had our first girls night last thurs...chilled here at my apt, ordered pizza, caught up and filled in each other about our holidays and watched chick flicks. we even baked shortbread cookies from scratch! haha...fun times. then yesterday we had our 2nd girls night of part 2...headed to applebee's and had dinner and freakin awesome desserts then shopped. girls night 3 is next thurs....gonna get drunk and party it up at the taphouse =D with minners! excited!!!!

i was even able to go out firt weekend back. i headed to windsor for tris' birthday. it was good times. i REALLY needed a weekend like that. no worries, having fun, meeting new people, drinkin and what not.

things are going well now.
i've got *things* on my mind...but in time it will be all sorted out.
i hope.

can't wait till friday so i can go homeeeee and celebrate ate nen and weirdo's birthday.
=)

so here it is. the final stretch. the final four months of my university career [well just as long as i get into grad school! lol, if not, i shall be going through it all one more time =S]

first week of being back at school is almost done. my schedule has it's good but it's not so good moments. on the bright side, i have 2 days off: tuesday and thursday =D...on the not so bright side my mondays are crazy and my wednesday's end pretty late =(....on monday, i have class from 9:30am-9pm straight with only a one hour break in between [1:30-2:30] and on wednesday's i have a night class ...booo to night classes. it's intro to jazz and today was interesting and relaxing listening to jazz, but uhh we'll see how it goes.

after all the late nights and stressin and work and time i put into last semester, i didn't do as great as i wanted, so i'm determined to make my last semester the BEST *crosses fingers*....i already went to the library today and got readings done! yay me! haha

during my break i didn't get a chance to see everyone who i wanted to see, which sucks, but oh well. i think i'm getting used to the fact that everyone says "lets chill, it's been so long. we have to do something" or something along those lines. but when it comes down to it, no one likes to make the effort to actually get together and do something to change the fact that we haven't seen each other in months, or years. like many other times, it became even more clear that if i don't put the effort into calling people or what not, then really nothing gets accomplished.

this year i promised myself that i'm done. i'm here for my friends when they need me and i'm here if they ever need someone to talk to or a shoulder to cry on, but i'm done getting into people's problems and trying to solve them for them. i'm done being the one to make all the plans and keep these friendships alive. because honestly, if our friendship is not as important to you as it is to me and if you're not going to put any effort into it at all then why should i? i've realized that true friends are the ones who will always be there for you regardless, and those friendships don't need much work. if you want to see each other, you will. if you want to talk to each other you will. why do you have to work so hard? i'm done with living in the past and worrying about *you*

i guess i just needed to get some venting out so that i can enjoy this year and make the best of it! haha.

2006 has it ups and it's downs but i am glad that i experienced everything that i did, because it has helped me to be a better person and i do hope that 2007 will only challenge me in ways that helps me find out more about myself and helps bring me closer to the people that matter.

so cheers to the new year
and cheers to new beginnings
but most important cheers to my last semester of university! =D

happy 2007!!!
unfortunately i have no pics to post b/c although we took soo many nice pics and funny ones too....i won't be able to see them since the camera we were using had no memory card =(
boooooooooooooooo
*tear*
i'm sad

what a way to start the year
haha

oh well the memories will live i guess =S
hope you had a good one
5:25am....ummm..i think i should finally sleep! hahaha

night

christmas was awesome! spent it in NY with the fam and had a great time
got crazy sore from boxing from the wii
got addicted like whoa to battling the japanese in tetris on my pretty new white DS! haha
drunk crazy janet was able to come out and have some crazy times at ice in NYC as our pre-chrismtas party. well really it was someone's birthday but i didn't really know the girl so it was a pre-christmas party for me at least! haha...it was some good freakin times. i wouldn't let people pass unless they danced, i didn't remember taking some pics and i just had a freakin good time! it was awesome. NY makes their drinks wayyyy stronger! i love it! hahaha...

now new years is almost here...my kuyas from NY are probably driving right now on their way here so they can spend new years with us. i usually don't do anything for new years. i'm the family type and i chillax with the fam and don't do anything, but maybe for once i shall be going out...with the cousins of course but that means more drunken good times! hahaha

so it's done. i sent my applications today for grad school! =S and now all i can do is hope for the best *crosses fingers* ...as i was standing in line at the post office i was in awe b/c i feel like it was just yesterday i was filling out applications and getting nervous that i wouldn't get accepted to just university and now university is quickly coming to an end and i'm applying for grad school!...crazy i tell you!! it's just pure crazy!!!

i hope you all had a great christmas =)
enjoy the rest of your holiday
i know i for sure will now that i don't really have anything to worry about =D

DONE!

*balling like a baby*
i just got back not too long ago from the WORST exam EVER!!!...sooo sad =(
note to self...DO NOT write 2 exams in one day with no sleep! =(

i stayed up till morning times....correction...i got no sleep last night....well 20 min naps here and there...not many of them but if you consider that sleep, then you're crazy! haha
had two exams today....was studying nonstop...cognitive neuroscience and neuropsychology was at 2pm...i went in feeling confident...was doing well and then ran out of time=(..at least i didn't leave anything blank....i think it was alright...not the BEST...but alright...

went home, ate dinner and looked over chem.
apparently i didn't look hard enough b/c when i got in that exam..it was over!
honestly, i have never in my 4 years of university EVER felt that way that i did during this exam!...
i was just sooo tired, my brain was honestly sooo gone that i was shaking, i felt like i was gonnna cry and have an anxiety attack right there....
maybe it was an anxiety attack...i've never had one
but i stayed there hoping i would remember how to do those questions b/c i KNOW i know how to do them but my mind went completely BLANK
i couldn't believe it
you know your exam is bad when you just start guessing and filling in circles! =S
NEVER EVER AGAIN

why is it that in my last freakin year of university is when i'm experiencing all this crap?
i guess university isn't complete without it! haha
ARGHHHHH

2 more
i just want to freakin go HOME!!!!!

nervous breakdown ....again
*sigh*
k really now...i can't take this ...i REALLY need to calm down and relax...i just want to go hommmmeee =(
i think i'm at this point where i really just can't take school right now. this semester has been brutal on me...i've never really experienced a true nervous breakdown until this semester!
had an exam yesterday and i have my two hardest ones tomorrow
WHY would you let someone write chem and neuropsych on the same day??@!?!?! damn you registrar's office!

my exam from friday was rescheduled to sunday....i just now found out its a 7pm! ARGH....
another day extra here...=(

i'm not kidding
YOU...yes you! haha...you have to make sure we chill during the break b/c i REALLY need to forget about school for a bit
ok? OK!

i think i'm done crying now
i should get back on it

so my alarm clock woke me up @ 7:30am b/c i had to get ready for work...
i'm lying in bed not wanting to get up then on the radio i hear "everyone should just stay inside. please don't go out b/c it's horrific out there..." i'm thinking to myself i know it's been snowing non-stop but is it really that bad???...

he goes on saying "buses are supposed to be running but i'm not too sure if they are, i'll have to find out. all high schools are closed, western and fashawe are closed"...at that point i was like are you kidding me!?!? haha...so i get up...turn on my loptop and check out the university webpage and called the university switchboard and it was true...western was closed due to the snow storm! i was like wow...then i read on and found out that my exam that was supposed to be tonight at 7pm was cancelled and is going to be rescheduled! i was in shock kinda...i mean wow....snow days REALLY do exist!...took 4 years for one to happen but it happened! LOL

i spoke to my brother and apparently you guys have no snow at home?!?! haha...so if it's hard for you to believe...here's a little perspective on how much snow we got...my roommate came into my room last night and asked me if i went outside. i knew there was snow b/c when i left for work yesterday there was already snow and it was still snowing. it was snowing the whole day that when i finally left campus (i was there for 8 hours or so) there was a lot more snow then there was initially...but my roommate told me when she got home ...the snow was knee deep (yea i know we're not tall but that's a lot of freakin snow! haha) and she said that when she opened her car door, snow just went into her car! then to think that it STILL continued to snow...the whole night and was still snowing when i woke up...that's a lot of snow nes pas? lol

while i was at work yesterday it was getting REALLY cold and apparently one of the main pipes burst and there was no heat in any of the buildings on campus! they were already talking about postponing exams....but then they got it fixed and everything is ok...then a snow day...i guess exams just weren't meant to start today! lol

i just really hope this snow storm doesn't screw up my exam schedule...they're either going to put it on a day i already have an exam or make me stay later since i finish on the 16th....i just know it!...if they put it on the last day of exams i'll be sooo sad b/c honestly i really wanted to write this exam tonight and get it out of the way b/c it's supposed to be one of my easier ones.... arghhhh...oh well

i figure
things happen for a reason right?

this day has been good b/c:
(+) snow storm made me not have to go to work
(+) i got my mark back from my essay when i pulled that all-night and stayed up for 32 hours straight...i honestly thought it was a really shitty essay..i mean i wasn't too proud of it and thought i could've done better b/c at one point i was just blabbing on and i didn't even know if i was making sense...buuuttt...i got an A baby!! yayyyy! i was extremely scared since my prof is also a grad prof too so i thought he was going to mark REALLY hard..guess it wasn't as shitty as i thought! ha!
(+) exam cancelled meaning i dont' have to walk home late in the snow at 10pm after it
(-) i actually really wanted to get this exam over with
(+) i was able to finally have a REALLY good breakfast! i made banana-chocolate chip pancakes and longanesa (sausage)
(+) i took a nap and felt soo good after since i haven't gotten much sleep lately

the positives clearly outweigh the negatives...so YAY!! =D
guess it's time to finally hit the books

dress warmly =)

this term officially went by wayyy too fast
i handed in my last paper for the term and now the only thing left are finals
i still can't believe it's almost december

where did the time go!?!?!

after my essay due yesterday and paper due today i decided to go to the mall to unwind for a bit
surprisingly i didn't buy anything!
weird
well i bought floss! haha...they have flavored ones now other than just mint...it says it's for kids but whateverrrr hahaha =D

i should really start reading =S
i wanna just go home now...i think i've had enough stress

everyone's been soo busy lately
really i shouldn't be saying anything b/c school has gotten be tied up as well
i don't see or talk to anyone

not too long ago i was in one of those weird moods
it was retarded
i wanted to watch a chick flick so i popped on in then i didn't want to
but i wanted to watch something...
i ended up watching 90210

i wanted to go out but then i didn't
i wanted to talk to someone but there was on one there

i think it's time i get back in touch my roots
rebuild those links with old friends b/c honestly lately i've been feeling alone
and ....it sucks
but why am i always the one trying to rebuild? *sigh*

i have an essay due on tues and a paper due on wed
i honestly hate psych papers b/c you gotta do soOOO much research
i really have to get this ish done this weekend b/c there's no way i'm pulling another all nighter

finals are quickly approaching and it sucks hardcore
this semester went by wayyyy too fast
i only went out once! =(
i told myself i was going to enjoy 4th year but really ...i haven't
oh well..there's always next semester...with 2 days off i better have more time! lol

i hate being in this mood
being blah sucks

sldkfjslkdfjlskdfjlsdkjflskdjflskdfjlskdfj

hope you're all doing better than me
tell me wussup

i was completely dreding november to come b/c of all the stuff i had...i wasn't sure if i'd be able to handle it...hence the nervous break down i had a couple of weeks ago...

but it's over...im brain dead and burnt out but done...haha
and i'm glad to say i got through it!
i'm not gonna lie..it was tough

i've been doing school work non stop for almost 3 weeks....
first to study for chem for my test on the 4th...then i had 2 things due the mon and tues after...plus i had to do all my readings and study like whoa for my midterms that i just had on monday and tuesday and then i ended up pulling an allnighter to get my essay done which was due on yesterday....

after all the sleepless nights...staying up straight for 32 hours...missing out on chillin when i other people were having fun...it actually paid off...well at least for 2 of them so far =D yayyy

but i'm not totally in the clear yet...b/c i have an essay and a paper due in less than 2 weeks then its finals right after *sigh*...never ending....
i cannot wait for christmas vaca!

i was at the mall the other day and they were playing christmas music and i absolutely loved it! haha...christmas music just really gets me in a good mood! =D

right now i'm here at work and i'm pretty freakin tired....i was fallin asleep and then i realized i had my laptop with me so now i'm awake! haha =D

going home right after class and i can't wait to...
to see my family, visit my aunt at the hospital, chillax with my girls, sleep in my bed, do my laundry....i just can't wait to go home! haha

lesson learned....things really DO get better =)

i've just been doing work soo much i feel guilty for not reading right now! HA!

like many of you, i grew up with 90210. it was my favourite show EVER! when i found out the creator didn't want to sign the release papers to put it on dvd, i was really upset.

now, i have to study for my midterms coming up on monday and tuesday, but hmm....how am i supposed to study when i bought it! hahaha...uh oh...

yayyyy for


i went to buy milk, eggs and bread...and i came back with it! haha...now that's some expensive milk, eggs and bread! haha
i think i need a study break....k well a break before i study! lets pop it in!! hahaha =D
have a grreaatt day everyone! i know i will =D hehe

today is not only rememberance day, but it's also my friend jackie's birthday. i've been thinking about her the past couple of days, wondering how she's doing, if she's really happy where she is right now. i just hope that she is. thinking about her smiling and laughing and just chillin and talking to her are great thoughts, but i just get sad b/c i'll never be able to do that again. *sigh* i really miss her =(

on a happy note, i've been sticking to my schedule! yay for me!
no more nervous breakdowns! i've been getting my ish done and still having some time for breaks and time for myself, which is good. i even had a chance last week to get drunk! haha...i've NEVER been that drunk ever!..it was grrreatt! lol

alright i should get working on my essay

happy 22nd birthday jackie
you're always in my heart <3

i got back not too long ago from my chem test and i must say i felt really good about it...surprisingly! hahaha...i obviously did'nt get as much studyin done as i wanted to b/c on thursday me and my roommate kinda had a crazy and adventurous night! haha...so i did'nt get much studying...i studied alll day yesterday and was getting scared but came out of the exam feeling good! =D....let just hope now that it's not one of those exams where you think you did really well but then your mark says the complete opposite! hahaha *crosses fingers*

i was talking to a friend the other day and she totally made me regain my confidence...she told me to just go for it and that this is my last set of midterms in first term....i told her that theres's a possibility i might be coming back next year if i don't get into grad school and she told me to not think about that and "go for it and don't use plan b as a cushion." i never realized until she said that that i feel like i have been focusing more on plan b than plan a...i study and i figure if my grades aren't that great it doesn't matter b/c i'm coming back...but really she's right...i really need to push myself and get the grades i want!...so thanks jen =D

let's just hope this chem test was the beginning of great feelings after midterms. i'm starting to see things in a different perspective. i can totally do this!!!! and i'm gonna try my hardest to stay on top of thing and don't fall behind ...but i have to make sure i don't stress myself out and take some time out for myself to rest...i don't want any other nervous breakdowns!
so today is my chillaxin time and im excited! i plan to get some readings done before min gets here then tonight...it's all about chillin on the couch, watchin dvds and drinking!!! ooohhh how i haven't done that in a while!! yayyyyyy chillin =D

have a great weekend everyone =D

ps i was just listening to a kanye song...what a freakin loser he is huh? haha...when i heard about the mtv awards in europe i was like LOSERRRR! haha...yea his stuff is still alright but lets just say im not a big fan anymore...haha

not too long after i wrote my entry last night...it happened
i really did have a nervous breakdown...i just totally broke down and starting crying
=S
it helped a lil i guess...but then i totally woke up with the biggest headache this morning =S...not cool

today i'm feeling a little better. i went to work b/c i had to take someone's shift. after work they had the grad school fair at ucc so i just went up and walked around for a bit to get more information on schools and stuff. i was talking to a the lady from MAC and she made me feel a little better...she told me that you'd be surprised at the marks that actually go through ...many ppl think you need A's and really high marks, but there have been times when ppl didn't get them and their marks were lower but the other stuff mattered and it's really the whole package they look at. i did feel a little at ease when i heard that and so it really did give me some hope

i even got 2 chapters read at work today so that made me feel better too!

i was looking at my schedule again earlier and i felt the stress building on, so i just totally worked out a schedule (which i do everyday, but sometimes don't follow it!)...but i set out my scheule for the next 2 and a half weeks to make sure that i'll have enough time to get things done and get in enough study time. it i just stick to it then i should be fine....that again put me at ease!

it's time to look at things positively and i just need to stay calm
i can do it!!
right?
i really hope so...just with no more nervous breakdowns please

i hope that you're all doing better than me.
i know i'll be crazy busy but if you have time email/text me hi so i know i'm not alone in this world and that there still are people outside of these walls in my apt! haha

wish me luck